Muppet's Journal

Feeling quite down this morning, but trying hard to shake it off/ignore it.  The reasons why are behing the cut, but you can skip this if you like  ;)

Well, I guess the main reason is I have a quite important meeting on Tuesday to attempt to resolve my potentially screwed financial situation - and I honestly couldn't say which way it will go - and that's not just me being pessimistic.  I've tried (successfully) to not think/worry about this meeting the last couple of weeks, but this weekend it's been the first thought in my head when I wake up in the morning.  Therefore I need to concentrate the next couple of days on pushing it out again - there really is no point at this stage worrying about it - whatever happens will happen on Tuesday.

Also, I'm alternately pissed off/upset about what I perceive to be the situation over at the forum right now - I say perceive because I am a little paranoid at times, and I do tend to take things personally.  As predicted, I was primarily blamed for the guidelines we put in place to stop the ridiculous amounts of spam posts we were getting - and I stick by that decision.  And yes, I pushed for this to happen, but then so did those who took the time to email Gater or myself to say it was getting ridiculous.  I took a little flack at the time, mostly privately, but way less than I'd expected, so I thought it was all OK.  Since then, though, the general atmosphere over there feels different, and I'm not the only one who's noticed it - it was commented on the other day in an email a friend sent me.  Also, (and this is where my paranoia shows!) I get the distinct feeling that the majority of what I post is ignored.  Sure, I sometimes get some sort of half-hearted response, but usually it's nothing - and that's since the guidelines issue.  I try really hard to generate posting when things get slack for a while, and these days it just fails every time.  Other people do the same thing and get instant results. It should piss me off, but I just find it upsetting, but that's my fault cos I take things to heart too much.  I have seriously contemplated the last few weeks, just pulling out of there altogether - it's not like I don't have enough RL stress - but I helped set that place up and it would be a huge wrench to walk away from it.  And because I'm finding this subject very upsetting, I'm going to leave it there.

I'm hoping to start on a vid today - sadly not SGA as I don't have enough material yet.  It's an F4 vid, which I would like to get finished before next weekend for The Boy as it's his birthday this week  :)

Also, on the search for Season 2 of SGA - all help appreciated  :)

*Hugs to all*